| operative network | personal site: creative - relativity

words and sounds

One of my earliest ambitions in life was to be a successful musician. I don't mean regular gigs, sit in successful. I mean 1908s Michael Jackson, more money than God, transnational tour successful.

During numerous 1990s attempts in this, as both a rapper and a singer, I discovered I had very little stage presence. I also discovered, as an entertainment journalist, that "talent" -- the singers themselves -- are used up by the entertainment industry like toilet tissue, and so very few have a shelf life of longer than a year or two if they make it to the big show of national and international regard. So I decided I wanted to work behind the scenes, to not be in front of the camera or microphone or what have you.

However, my creative urges did not go away. I still sang relentlessly. In the same way that TV character Remington Steele could toss out a movie reference for every situation, I have a song lyric on the tip of my tongue regardless of what happens. Music is a vital part of my life, and when all else goes wrong it has sustained and lifted me. The only thing I've had a longer relationship with is anger.

There are two main areas of music in my creative life. First, I sing karaoke. It started out as a hobby, and now it's a part of my professional life.

Secondly, I have been making music, off and on, for the last ten years (starting in 1994, I'm writing this in November of 2004).

I explore both of those areas here. I may be good, I may suck, I sometimes don't know, and I mostly don't care. I work hard to try and improve, but ultimately the music is a connection for me to something spiritual, even when I'm singing something hoochie. Hitting the right notes and making my voice propel outwards, in my car or on a microphone, makes me feel really good inside, so I do it as often as I can.

UPDATE DECEMBER 8, 2009: There used to be some links to a Yahoo! Briefcase with MP3s of me doing spoken word and singing. Then I moved and disconnected the DSL account associated with them and there they went. I haven't slowed down to recreate this online experience. I may. I also spent a lot of Q4 2009 helping my stepdaughter and nieces make their own multitrack songs in Garageband. I may post that one day. I also have tons more stuff, half done, all the way done, and what not, that I never posted. I may put that stuff online. No promises. Just in case you were asking, or noticed that it disappeared.

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